When we interact with people, we make sense of the interactions using our own unique relational lens. Our relational lens or template is created from past experiences with others, specifically our caregivers. As babies, we quickly develop expectations of others in relation to ourselves, setting us on a path of habitual relationship patterns. Unless you’re aware of your primary relational template (what therapists call “attachment style” ), your childhood experiences with caregivers will predict the type of relational experiences you’ll have as an adult. This can be a dreaded realization for people who grew up in difficult family environments and vowed never to turn out like their father or mother.
